Black Women Asian Men United

To support, encourage, & promote interaction between Asian Men & Black Women.

my depressing story------ HELP!!!???

It started three years ago when i first saw him in music class he asked me what i played i answered then rushed to my next class. Then i was very shy even now i am still shy but i got better since then .we didn't talk until last year where i asked it he wanted to buy candy for this fundraiser i was doing. we went our separate ways. It like every time i see him i feel more of an attraction towards him when i see him i feel pain in my heart. anyway last Thursday i gave a letter to my friend to give to him telling him how i feel. then later i find out he has a girlfriend. I did not put my real name but my nick name and he befriended my friend to ask her what my name is . so yesterday she told him  and she told me he might say hi to me on Tuesday. i see him right before second and fifth period. Do any one have any advise for me ?

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Comment by Velvet Monarch on September 6, 2013 at 8:01pm

 I know what it's like to come across a seemingly unapproachable guy, so I am going to share my padawan to  jedi techniques on friend-zoniness.  From this point on-NO MORE NOTES! The Empire didn't send a letter to make a point, it blew planets up!  So like them, it's time for human interaction.  I concur with Crystal, keep it light. You're as cute as an Ewok so whenever you pass him, start with a shy smile, a small wave, look friendly, when you can finally catch your breath around him, say good morning or hi. The point is-acknowledge him, let him know you are alive! Goofiness and laughter are disarming weapons. You don't need a Jar Jar Binks for comic relief like Episode 1, if you are at a loss of what to say, on Wednesdays, do the corny hump day camel, whoo whoop! thing.  Every time he'll pass you on Wednesday you guys could do that, it will make you both smile.  Then it'll become automatic and your "thing".  "Happy Friday" him on Friday.  If you are dying to say something to him, point to the ground and say, "Hey, you dropped your smile..." He'll look down and smile-hell, he may use it on you ;) The point is- get him to feel more comfortable around you, so you can get to know him. Keep it light, eventually you'll work your way to talking.  When you are feeling a bit daring, let your friend be your "wing woman" as she has nothing to lose. Have her chat it up with him and then, greet him join in-even if it's to just stand there and smile-do NOT punk out or we'll freaking Force choke you!(just kidding). Not to mention, music is a common interest, and the subject is as vast as outerspace.  So use it like Vader does the Force, woman, make a cd of songs that remind you of him and do a disc swap! It will give you another reason to talk.   Hang in there and if you're lucky you'll make a new ally or blow his planet up!

Comment by Crystal on September 2, 2013 at 10:16pm

When he says hi to you, relax and go with the flow.

Since he has a girlfriend, I would definitely tread lightly. Friend zone him for the time being; and if it is meant to be, it will be.

Good luck!

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